CONFESSIONS OF A REFORMED SHOPAHOLIC

As Sheila Heti writes in her essay Should Artists Shop or Stop Shopping?, ‘I can only get to a new place if I stop buying — stop shopping on Amazon— stop succumbing to whatever material needs seem to emerge in the day’, I too knew salvation would only come if I quit. And in a way it did: I got my evenings back. I read. I took baths. I phoned friends I’d not spoken to in a while. I checked my bank balance an unhealthy amount, revelling in the fact that the money stayed put. It was nice to see an Instagram post and not immediately start searching for how I could buy the item. It was nice to not presume more stuff was the answer to a crap day at work or would solve yet another argument about there being wet towels left on the bed.

Of course, cold turkey is only ever the answer for so long. Unlike some addictive behaviours, like gambling or drinking, I can’t renounce shopping for life. ‘Mindful Spending’ is helping me learn how to practice spending and shopping with care. A financial advisor once told me ‘the most financially healthy person is the person who has the ability to connect their money with the things that make them happiest.’ When I was mindlessly scrolling and then buying because I was bored or because a sale email told me there were only a couple of items left, I wasn’t truly thinking about what I needed, or how this purchase might impact other purchases. I was following the whims of that day – and inevitably, a new whim would always arise the following day and so forth.

With mindful spending, I now practice a few lockdown golden rules (on top of installing an ad blocker and deleting my card information from google autofill). I keep a list. If I feel a need or a want it goes on the list. Chances are I don’t want what’s on the list a week later. I ask myself a few questions: Do I have something like this already? What could I spend the money on instead? Could I soothe myself in other (free) ways? Like going for a walk with a podcast, or getting some writing done, rather than scrolling for 30 minutes. I look at my bank balance regularly. And, finally, I’m staying cold-turkey on clothes until other people can see them.